and wait till i tell you this

Well I put one of my unofficial new year’s dodahs into practice today.

Not many people can say they got a ticking off at work for being too nice. Well that happened to me-seriously it did. You see I go out of my way to be helpful to people who I get on the phone at work. I give them my direct line to make sure that they get me as I do favours I am not supposed to. People are very grateful-yes, but the fact that they have my number means my phone rings non stop at this time of year and I can’t do the work that is actually piling up. Today I was much more firm in setting up payment plans and told that I have to be stricter and told them no more chances-if they should fall behind they will not get a second chance AND I made them make bigger payments as this was the only way that they could clear a debt.  I have actually ordered a little Darth Vader bobble-head for my desk at work to encourage me to feel the dark side at the start of a working day. To be honest I actually liked this new dark side of me.

There’s a blog that I am following about this guy who is doing 366 random acts of kindness this year and it is truly cringey reading.One was that during a trip to New York he was taken aback by the down and outs,the homeless begging in the streets-so he said he was going to go out and buy a big bag of apples and hand them out to the beggars. Now what do you think a homeless wino in the streets would prefer-a few bits of loose change to buy his/her next bottle of wine or an apple? I know the guy means well-but I think he is very naive and is in danger of getting beaten up some time. I think today he was helping people hail cabs in new york-be it people in the street or doormen at hotels. Maybe some people will think this guy is doing great things-but me? I find the whole thing a joke,asking for trouble and self gratification big time. But maybe this opinion is the dark side really taking over me?

And another thing-is anyone as peed off as I am about all the stuff about the 100^th anniversary about the Titanic? I cannot see why Belfast is bragging so much about this great ship. For crying out loud the thing was a failure-badly made with loads of money saving short cuts that resulted in a great many lives lost. There is a myth here in Northern Ireland that the ship was cursed because the protestant work force in that supposedly great ship yard painted the reg number 3606 0N on its side because when this was reflected upside down in the water it would have looked like No pope. Now whether there is any truth in that I doubt it-but it’d still a good story. And how long before there is a movie about the flow of the iceberg if the ship had not struck it?

As I type it is almost easter and tv will have loads of special family movies on. We’re bound to see that one about the guy who was dead for three days and then came back to life –what was it…….oh yes E.T.   Ah there’s still a few miles in that one. I am hoping to get out on my beloved gerdymobile over the long weekend-but apparently we could have snow.

Any that's it y'all take care now y'hear?

and here's the set up

Was in a pretty low ebb an decided comfort eating was the only answer.

So I had two or three squares of chocolate and a biscuity thing, tomorrow I may indulge in some jelly-babies.So lent has finished a week early for me this year-first time in donkeys this has happened.

Nothing seems to be going right at the moment and I just want to lock myself away somewhere, where nobody could find me.

So what’s been going on? The ear wax problem is finally sorted.When she was about to give a blast of the stuff the nurse said to me that it might hurt-to which I replied-“bring it on,I deserve the pain” then she said I might feel dizzy as well-it took me 5 seconds to realize the whole hearing/balance thing-and when I stepped outside I did feel a bit giddy. Any way I have learned my lesson and I feel like someone who is trying to give up the cigarettes or whatever-I am so tempted to shove a piece of rolled up kitchen roll or the arm of my glasses into my ear-just for the sake of a habitual poke-but I’m doing well here-and am fighting the urge well.

The new cycling glasses I ordered (which were quite expensive) have had to be returned twice by the optician as he did not like the work done-got a phone call today telling me that they are off to Paris now to get sorted-its been over a month now since I ordered them. By the time I get them I’ll probably need a new prescription and they’ll be useless.

Came across another blog by chance 366 random acts of kindness.Started off ok –bit like the danny Wallace mini book. But it suddenly got really twee and cringeworthy-in fact some of the acts were so excruciating it was funny. Somebody told me that psychologists have said that people just do these random acts of thingy just to make themselves feel good and the telling about them adds to the whole self gratification thing.

The American trip idea that  I was playing about with is most definitely off now-well for this year any way. I was talking to a sister about it and she said that going by the way I was talking about it, I would be better doing the Irish holidays. And when I told her about the reading and thinking about the burren, getting an email from someone saying that he was doing the burren this year, and THEN the book I reading about the burren mentioning the van from the company I do the cycling holiday with –was a pretty good omen to do the burren trip. Somebody else(who does not read this) said that she was glad I was not going to America as well.

The rambling club was over by Glenariff last week. We had near perfect weather.We saw some great views. The walk took us over some private land, and somebody warned us that the owner did not like people walking over his land.Thankfully it was a Sunday and the owner was more than likely in his home reading his King James listening to William McCrea.  On his land there was a plethora of stone circles and ancient burial sites. Plus a stunning waterfall-pity due to very dry weather we did not see it in it’s full glory. In a way I could understand why the owner did not like people tramping over his land –as there would be multitudes of people there all year round.Some not as careful as others-probably destroying and defacing the stoneage monuments. We were careful-and thoroughly enjoyed what we saw.

Those dreadful talent shows are on tv again-I don’t like them and the ones on a Saturday evening are enough to get me going out to mass.

Had my annual work review today-boss told me I was too customer orientated and that I need to stop giving out my direct line as too many people will be phoning me back-and I’ll get no work done-he also told me I might do something I’m not suppose to and get into trouble. Apart from that he said I put in an excellent year. So now I have decided to order a little Darth Vader Bobble Head and every morning at work I will tap its head and say “dark side gerdy feel the dark side.”

Like I said nothing seems to be going right-within time I’ll get one or two things sorted –but at minute I just want to go away somewhere and be on my own for a while,think some things over and work out a way of getting on my feet.

That’s it for now-oh this weekend is the final mtb ride and then the gerdymobile will be officially back on the road. Mind you saiorse might be brought out for a trip over to rathlin, in the summer with a bit of luck-they do a really really good pint of Guinness over there.

previously in my life

So what has been going on in my humdrum life? Not a terrible lot to be honest. Twice in the past three or four weeks I have dreamt that my car disappeared from a car park.Don’t know what would be in my subconscious to trigger this off.I always seem to be wandering around a half full car park  wondering it I am actually in the right car park then when I am reaching heights of exasperation I wake up.

I was having problems making out what people at work to saying to me-and after about a week of this and about 2 days of using olive oil I decided to see a doctor. She got out her little telescope thing looks in my ears and told me the right one was bunged up the wax and the left one was not as bad, and got me to book in with the treatment room to get them syringed.  I was expecting the nurse to give me a telling off when I told her that although I did not use the cotton buds to clean my ears, but I did use a screwed up piece of kitchen roll-but decided not to mention using the end of a knitting needle (I lied about one there).Any way she gave me a blast of the syringe thing and said the right one was pretty hard –so I need to come back for a second blast next week.So hopely things will be back to normal then.

Sometime ago there was a somewhat frequent off in my local book shop-well a glorified news agent to be honest. Three for the price of two-and as always it was a struggle picking a third one-so for the third one I –well now that I’m here the first two were “I Partridge”-Alan Partridge, which if you know the television character is very funny; “Charles Dickens a life” by Claire Tomalin.Which I stuggled with and gave up-but will try again-soon. Now for the third one I chose a book I thought I’ll just throw it in the bag of stuff for thee charity shop,it was “Billy Connolly’s Route 66”.Now I am not a big fan of the big yin any more,but I decided to give a book a go last week and it is surprisingly not bad at all.Think I prefer him doing this sort of thing than comedy,and occasionally he says a few things that made me scratch my chin and mumble “good point” and actually underlined it (can’t do that on a kindle).

But then I do prefer travel literature any way.

Getting pop up ads saying that I am due 250 free business cards-all I pay is the p/p which is pretty cheap. I noticed how freely Americans seem to hand out business card-a guy I met on holiday last year gave me his business card so we could keep in touch. And when I was leaving a hotel in DC some 8 years ago  another person leaving at same time said we could share his taxi-we got off first and were about to pay the driver he said it was ok and he would sort it out (obviously he was on a business trip and could claim I ton his expenses I thought). I said thank you very much and he reached me his business card. So I was wondering what could I put on a card? Occupation? Sound Guy? Crazy Cyclist/Hiker?

Been kind of off Face Book during lent-although I did sneak a look in once or twice. And to be honest I am not missing it.Other than following a few magazines,cycling and photography things I could do without it.

My USA trip-still undecided-planned to talk to someone about the pros and cons last week but meeting fell through-maybe next week.

Learnt a couple of new tricks on photoshop elements –well one trick. Other one involved getting out with tripod and using a filter for camera that I bought a couple of years ago but never used and here is my handy work

  and

Didn’t quite have the effect I wanted.But I’m getting there.

And that’s about it-Oh managed to get out on the gerdymobile for first time this year today and was gooood –soon be time to put the mtb away until October/November.Think I must be one of few people looking forward to losing that hour in a couple of weeks time -as this means i can get out on the gerdymobile after work.

here's what's happening-kind of

For the two people that are interested, I am doing lunch with a buddy next week and, (hopefully) amongst other problems I am going to discuss the pros and cons about my on/off American trip.I actually have made a list. I have other problems that I have been carrying around for a number of years and I feel I really HAVE to get them out of my system. To be honest it might take a couple of pints, or even talking to a professional, but I really do need to talk to someone.

My spoiling myself plan (new year's resolutions) is actually taking shape. Some are trivial little things but-it still counts as treats. So far (and I DO have a list made) I have got the following

1 A denim jacket

2 Two pairs of DMs (well I kind of needed new shoes any way, so does it really count?) but these are great footwear.

3 A graphic novel-got a Batman one-not as good as I was led to believe, but has got me back into the graphic novel mode again.

4 A tripod for my camera

 5 A funky new lens for the camera- a sigma 28mm f1.4

6 New hiking boots and gaiters

7 New cycling glasses

I am thinking about getting a personal radio. And I may do a photography course. I did have one booked but cancelled it as travel times to get to it proved most awkward.So may try another in May.

I'm  sure I could get some other stuff if I make it to America-but the chat next week will decide that. I have sized up the fors and againsts for that. And I’ll let yous 2 know next week.

I’m kind of off Face Book for lent and I may go with tradition (well it is with us Irish) and log in on Saint Patrick’s day to see what’s going on and to see if I'm missing it or not-so far I’m not. I know I can log this on there without having to log in myself.

Marnie-I’ll send you an email next week.

Incidentally Friday is traditionally treat day with me and amongst them is a packet of free state tayto cheese n onion-but I’m off the crips for lent-arrrgh
Incidentally Marnie thank you for your comment on the last blog-glad you liked the humour.

lent

Lent. Ah got to be the 2^nd most important  conversation  period after Xmas (ok Christmas). After the question “What’s Santa bringing you?” the runner up is “What are you giving up for Lent?” Now it’s not “What are you doing for Lent?” It’s “What are you giving up?”

Lent is a very Catholic thing, although I do know one or two Protestants who do the the Lent thing too mind you. Although I rarely go to mass I do do the Lent thing.

I have noticed that it has it’s unofficial rules,obviously invented by the Irish-we’re good at get out clauses.

1 You can be too young/old to give something up

2  As some people give up “the drink” for Lent and St Patrick’s Day falls during the “holy period” You are allowed to break you Lenten fast on this day.This also applies to sweets,cookies, whatever etc I personally think this clause is for wimps-and never adhere to it.

3 If your birthday falls during the period this is also an excuse.I mean how can a child have a birthday party without the goodies and how can you go to a friend’s birthday party and not indulge in the feast of goodies.

4 Bending the rules-some children would give up sweets but not crisps (potato chips, or as we in Derry say crips) And some parents would allow the offspring to eat sweets on a Sunday-as “Sundays were not lent” (I remember my sisters hording the weekly sweet collection and at the stroke of midnight on Saturday evening it was a dive into a multitude of enamel rotting delicacies)

5 –Rather than give up sweets. We would give up swearing,dodging homework-or just something we should not be doing in the first place.

Like I said I do do the lent thing-and I’m good at it. One year I gave up sweets and chocolate and I actually  managed to stay off for three years. What started me again? A very attractive new girl at work who I was flirting outrageously with offered me a square of chocolate and I fell off the wagon. Another time I gave my self a real challenge and added meat to my “off” list-including chicken. Now this was a real struggle for the first week. I was even having nightmares about it.One I remember vividly involved a very sexy woman from a car advert offered me herself or a plate of steak and chips-yep I took the steak

And the whole forty days and forty nights thing. What’s with that? Somebody told me this was a rough translation from a Hebrew word that basically meant “a long time”

So when the great flood was forty days and forty nights this could have been 100s of years.And when Jesus fasted for forty days and forty nights it might just have been five or six hours. I mean they had no watches then-had they?

Some people say the Lenten going off stuff is the easy way out and we should be doing something good instead. A woman at work says I should be going to Mass every morning at 7:00 am or at night during Lent-like I said they are trying to bring religion into everything now! Even though I am anything but devout the Lenten habit is just that –a habit. And helps get rid of some excess weight too  For me I think the Lent thing for me is more of  a personal purge that a spiritual thing.And maybe it’s easier to not do something than take on a new challenge.

ruts -can't live without em

“You can be addicted to a certain kind of sadness”

“When something goes right

   Well it’s apt to confuse me

   It’s such an unusual sight

   Oh I can’t get used to something so right”

Couple of song quotes for youns there.From songs by Gotye, well Gotye (featuring Kimbra) if ye must be pedantic about it, and Paul Simon. And pray why am I quoting these? I have these (kind of) and Marni to thank for making me realise something about me. My rut is a comfort zone.

Yes if things are generally not messed up or generally bad- I think something is wrong and it doesn’t feel right.

A couple of three examples. Much that I love cycling I have no great speed. Longevity-yes. I could cycle all day if my life depended on it-but cross the line first in a race? No chance. I was taking part in a quadathlon. Now this was a town council run relay race with 4 clubs in the town :- canoeing,running,cycling and swimming (in that order).The teams were chosen as a draw,so that there would be no superteam. In my team we had a very good canoeist, a good runner, me and a swimmer. Now when it was my turn to start my bit,we had a very good lead-I could not figure out why nobody was passing me.I only realised my lead when I was just over half way on the return leg and I met the first cyclist. My team actually won-no prize just my photo in paper holding a free t-shirt(that all entrants got) The t-shirt just had the 4 events,did not mention it was a relay race-so I had great fun misleading some gullible women into thinking I did all 4 events. Incidentally the next time i did the race things were back to normal and i was only 3rd off and 2 cyclists passed me.The third time doing the race it was a very wet and miserable day and i was so peeved i forgot my number and called out the wrong one when i arrived at the pool. I just grabbed my free t shirt, threw my bike in my car and made my gettaway and showered at home.

I was taking part in a cycling race 6 laps over a pretty hilly route. It was handicapped, and me being the weakest that night I was off first.This was my 3^rd time on this course and I had only just sussed out the knack of handling the route. Normally the other riders would catch me half way round the 3^rd lap and lap me on my 5^th . But this time I was half way round the 4^th lap and they had not passed me and I thought something had gone wrong and the race was cancelled. They caught me just as I went into the 5^th lap. After the race one of the guys in the scratch group came over to me and gave me a big pat on the back. He was confused why they did not get me at the usual spot, and thought I had dropped out, and said that he was really surprised when he saw me up ahead when he did-I told him I thought THEY had dropped out and I was on my own.

Now in that race I was doing pretty good.I was getting stronger (believe you me the hill was a toughie) AND I had learned how to be strategic (or something).But like I said,rather than think that I stood a chance of doing well-even win. It just did not feel right and I breathed a sigh of relief when the main bunch passed me.

At work my boss was giving me a very good annual report-I asked him to tone it down a bit as I did not fell comfortable with so much praise.

Ruts can get too comfortable. So comfortable you can’t live without them.Someone in a tv show said that if you don’t expect anything good to happen you are never disappointed. Home Simpson said  "Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is: never try."

Henry Ford or somebody else –who’s name escapes me said that whether you think that you can or or whether you think you  cannot do something you are right.

SO to cut a long and un-understandable  story short. I have sussed out probable flight times.Someone has suggested a different end to my holiday-I can easily (I think )add on a couple or three days to the itinerary. And anyway I could have a new comedy routine if it does go bad.

So it looks like the usa trip is definitely on. Unless of course that is, if Connie sends me an email to say that I stole her heart too and that she is coming back to Ireland to meet up the same time I am heading out there. But then-how in the name of cody jarrett’s mother could I handle some so good as that?

answers please-usa visit in jeporday

One or two or three  of you know I am in the process of planning a trip the the u s of a in May/June. Now the planned cities are Washington D C  and Philadelphia-not necessarily  in that order .

Now to say that I can be contrary is an understatement. In fact in the dictionary the definition of this word is Gerard Carton.

Much that this will be a big adventure I am going out of my way to find an excuse out of this. The only one that makes any sense is that I don’t like the idea of being airborne for that long a time. In  saying that, on my holiday last year I bussed it from Derry to Cork.Admittedly there was a 2 hour gap in Galway-and someone who flew from America that morning arrived in Cork an hour or two before me.But the bus is different-it is one the ground and I can see the scenery changing. One of the silly excuses is that my brother needs a loan to buy a car-now if I lent him the money that would mean I could not really afford the holiday-well actually I could,but I would convince myself that I couldn’t. Another reason is that a woman at work said that I was brave doing such a journey on my own, and not that is playing on my mind.Another is that if I can’t fly from Shannon instead of Dublin I’m not going.But I AM visiting travel agents to see what i can get and on saturday i will have a serious long chat will local travel agent.

Now to be honest I would much rather be hiking/cycling in Ireland.And I actually can afford the usa trip and do at least one cyling trip in the Burren (where I want to hike as well)

So someone please convince why I should go to amerrykay ? Another woman at work is egging me on to do the trip with the “you’ll be dead a long time” reason. And another woman who does not usually appreciate my warped humour laughed and gave me a “y’know you’re the sort of person who would do that” look when I told my scheme if I get a day in new york.

Remember the famous connie who’s picture I put up on another blog? I googled her shop –so I know the address. I was going to stand outside the shop –wait until she turns to look out the window –I would wait 2 seconds and then I would turn and walk away. Now that would really freak her out-serves her right for stealing my heart.

So like I said I would be much happier cycling/hiking in Ireland drinking ales that I like,munching crips that I love and hearing music that I adore, and   ( well most of the time) cycling on the left side of the road.

So would somebody please convince me why I should go to America? please?