Some folk are under the impression I hate Christmas in an Ebenezer Scrooge way (he was too soft if you ask me). I don’t hate Christmas; I actually like it-the whole family thing-the getting together and chilling out.
What I hate is the ritual- decorations-the labour of putting them up and within 10 minutes you don’t notice them.At work someone is bound to insist on getting new ones which are only fawned over when they come out of the box-after that ask the person where the new ones are amongst the rest and they won’t know.
My supposed hatred of Christmas is a running joke at work, but with my dry sense of humour one person this year did not catch one and when I threatened to remove the head of a hideous monkey that sung jingle bells when a button was pressed-she called me a miserable so and so and to let everyone else enjoy the season. About ten minutes later she actually apologized to me saying she was having a bad day-I of course told it was just an act and I expected responses like that. The office got revenge and made me give out the secret Santa presents this year-with my droll delivery and copying an eviction on the tv show “I’m a celebrity get me out of here” it went down very well and everyone commented on how funny it was-and they want me to do it next year(drat foiled again)
Any way what I hate most is the presents thing. Now once you stop believing in Santa the toys stop and the nothing but clothes start. I believe that Christmas and birthdays are a time when you should get something you want as opposed to some thing you need (or don’t need sometimes).I remember an aunt from England always sent us a parcel of presents at Christmas-toys. When I was ten everyone got cool toys-I got a horrid tie. Everyone else laughed and I realized-this is it, no more toys, it’s clothes from now on. Funny thing is, during my punk years, I thought the tie was so bad it was perfect-alas I no longer had it. I’m a big kid when buying presents and wait eagerly as they open the present only to see the forced smile with “oh that’s lovely” and then it's buried in a drawer never to be seen again. Now perfumes-I haven’t a clue, they all smell the same to me. You could give me a bottle of used bath water, put in a dash of toilet cleaner and tell me it’s an exclusive expensive perfume and I would believe you, and pay big money. Aftershave is the same, I never wear the stuff. I have a battered pullover that is 2 sizes too big for me-looks pretty horrible too, that I only wear in the winter around the house over a t-shirt or on the way into work when it is bitterly cold-NEVER worn at work. It is only washed once a year, in March –when it gets warmer. There are toothpaste stains on here from October –when I started wearing it this year. My mother hates this pullover and just does not get why I like it so much. There are new ones I got 2 or 3 Christmases ago that are still in drawer that were only worn once on the boxing day( or st stephen’s day) and they are not too big-drat.
I hate the whole shopping thing-the crowds, I love the open spaces-not a queue a mile long and 6 people wide. There is always someone 2 or 3 in front of me who forgets something and they send a precocious offspring back to get it and wait 10 minutes at counter for it to return. As I’m on my own I have to go to the back of queue again, if I forget something. Maybe I could make a few pounds by hiring myself as a “go back and getter.”
People say getting tokens/vouchers is cheating and thoughtless. Me? this is the ideal present I would be more than happy with tokens for HMVor my local book shop- I could go and get dvds of Northern Exposure or Seinfeld or …well anything. I actually just give vouchers now-as this saves any embarrassment
I told my mother this year not to get me anything as I don’t need nor want anything
“You too late “ she said “I got you something”………a jumper- that one’s done” and the worst thing is it will more than likely be the right size.I'll more than likely wear her jumper once or twice then it's back to old faithful -and after a while the pile of "new" jumpers will be off to the charity shop.
Merry bloomin’ Christmas folks-hope you get at least one toy-cos that’s what it’s all about.
So how did you spend/celebrate Christmas? You already know how I spent mine (part of it, anyway), from my blog. I agree, fun presents (as opposed to more practical presents) are, well, more fun. for instance, last year my sister and her husband bought a new flat screen TV and a Wii for the family for Christmas, and we all had loads of fun playing with it on Christmas day (and since too). Although I admit sometimes I like it when I get the practical gifts, especially if it's something big, b/c that means I don't have to spend my own money on it. :)
ReplyDeleteSo, hope you had a nice Christmas and got something fun to play with!